Dating.

Guys, along with girls, have seemed to forgotten how to date. Now days they just hang out, or hook up, and they assume each other knows it is a date, or that one of them is interested in the other one, or they don't really talk in general. The old fashioned traditional way of dating has been thrown onto the back burner, but it should not be at all, and here's why.

The old fashioned traditional dating tactic. The Guy (Usually the guy, can be the girl), Pays for the date, and plans it, and the guy and the girl are paired off together. When the guy pays for the date, that does not necessarily mean he has to pay money, but he should provide whatever is necessary for the date to happen. When he plans for the date, that means it should not be spontaneous, and out of the blue. It should planned. If a guy asks a girl on a date, then he should plan everything, and visa versa. Also, the two should be paired off together and, the two should be spending time together. It should be pretty much obvious that they are together for the date. There is a reason as to why this is so important.
In a marriage, the husband should be able provide for the family, protect the family, and preside for the family. If you look at the two, dating and marriage, it ties all together.

Preside------ Plan
Protect------ Paired off
Provide----- Pay for

While dating, with girls, it is "easier" to evaluate a potential spouse if they follow those "steps". The way we date is the way we marry. If a guy cannot provide, protect, and preside while dating, how do you expect them do be any better in marriage?This is exactly why the traditional way of dating is so important, and why couples should not just "hang out", or hook up to find a potential spouse.

Gender Roles

Males and female. Moms and dads. They both obtain their specific roles. Traits of females are; emotional, sensitive, gentle, nurturing, quiet, weak, soft, dependent and so on. Males... they are strong, tough, aggressive, rebellious, problem- solvers, active, competitive, tough-skinned, non- emotional, and so on. Mothers stay at home at work all day while nurturing the children, and they teach them these "roles," while fathers work hard all day earning a living for the family. This is how it's suppose to be... right??

Okay... lets look a little deeper. Some people tend to get caught up in this idea that females SHOULD and ARE like this, and males ARE and SHOULD act like that. If they do not have those traits, people tend to put them in these categories labeling them as "feminine" or "masculine". They tend to label them or even themselves as gay, even from a young age, just because they possibly obtain one of these characteristics, or personalities. Just because because a male is sensitive, or emotional that definitely defines him as gay. Right?? Let us look at this from a different point of view.

Females!! look at this graph. When looking at a man, and looking for a future companion, do you want a guy who is a little emotional? A little sensitive? Gentle? How about a man who is nurturing? I would almost guarantee, or assume, many females would not oppose some of these "feminine" traits.

Now males!! When looking for a female, how many would really oppose to a female have "masculine" traits? Like somebody who is strong, or active, or competitive, or a problem solver? I would again assume that not very many would! 

I think it is important to remember that just because a female is aggressive, and tough, and a male is sensitive or nurturing, that does not mean they are gay! Each person is so unique, and different, and every child should be raised both ways without being labeled.

My Family Culture Made Me Who I Am

I ponder about my family culture, and the person it has made me today. The beliefs it has led me to believe, the traditions I have grown up with, and the way I was reared up into this life in general. I grew up in a small and sheltered area where my school consisted of around 400 students, and around 40-50% of those students were LDS. My dad worked, and all growing up, my mother was a stay at home mom. She cooked my family breakfast every morning, and we ate dinner together as a family basically every night. We are all very close and focus the majority of our activities around our family. I live in the country where The closest mall is an hour and half away, and I never knew anything different. I spent the majority of my growing up life outside playing in the pasture, and barn, and getting dirty with my cousins. My cousin's live all along my road, so I grew up with them as my best friends. Like I mentioned, my family is very close... including my extended family.

I would consider my family as middle class. My parents did not attend college, so maybe some people would label us lower, but they are knowledgeable and know how to work and earn a living. We're comfortable, and because I grew up in the class I'm in, I feel I am humbled, and because of that I know I can be grateful for what I have. I'm actually grateful I grew up and was raised the way I was. I understand hard work, and the reward which comes from it. I know how to grow a garden, work in the house, work outside, care for farm animals, can food, and many other things, and I am so, so, sooo grateful for all of that! Yes, growing up in a sheltered area does have it's cons. For example, I had much of a culture shock when I would go on trips to Washington, or Oregon, or any areas really. It was so weird to me seeing these things that were quite normal for a lot of people, but entirely different for me. I still would not take anything back though.

Do I Even Have a Significance in My Home??

Many people growing up seem to have a "role" they play in their household. Some may be labeled as "The Peacemaker", or the "Second Mom", or the "Trouble Maker", and so on. While many people's “roles” are more prominent I have recently found myself really thinking about what my "role" could possibly be. Growing up with seven older siblings, and one younger, I have truly been wondering what not only mine, but my other family member’s, “significance” towards my household is. I completely understand everybody was put on the earth for a reason, but why are they placed specifically into the households they are in?  Can I really think of any big roles that any of the children in my family obtain that would make my family “less” without them?

It took me quite a bit of thinking and discussing it with others to finally realize how important even the little mini roles are. I recognized the little roles… no, more the personalities every member contributes to my family, making my home the wonderful place it is. I realized I have my own person to go to for anything I need help with, so that’s pretty cool!! I began looking for all the personalities and roles every child contributes to the home, and this is what I found; I’m only doing my siblings, not my in-laws, but my in-laws have contributed such an awesome spirit to the home as well.

-          Sibling Uno: She is super understanding, a great listener, so caring, and has awesome humor. She’s hilarious actually.

-          Sibling 2:  Also a good listener, and gives good incite on situations or thoughts. He’s extremely caring, and goofy… a good goofy. 

-          Siblings 3: She super competitive, which is super fun… and stressful, and she’s soooo easy to talk to, and she’s encouraging and helps people work towards their dreams and goals.  She’s pretty funny too…

-          Sibling 4: She’s understanding and really good at seeing things from other people’s point of view.  She’s an awesome role model, and she’s… funny.

-          Sibling 5: He keeps out of other people’s business, but is there if somebody needs somebody to talk to. He’s very spiritual and gives awesome insight. He’s pretty weird too.

-          Sibling 6: She’s super easy to talk to, and gives great advice and comfort when it’s needed. She’s also pretty funny, and she thinks she’s hilarious, which makes it that much better.

-          Sibling 7: He is super adventurous and always up for doing fun crazy things, and he’s so fun to be around. He really enjoys trying to make people laugh, and is hard working and dedicated.

-          Sibling 8: That’s me…. Apparently I’m the weird one in the family.

-          Sibling 9: She is so strong, and brings such a sweet and needed spirit into the home. She’s understanding, and if she’s given a job, she’ll put her whole heart into it and work as hard as she can. She thinks she’s hilarious, and she is, so that’s okay. Apparently my whole family is just hilarious.

I realize how different my home would be without each and every one of my family members. Everybody brings a special spirit that is needed to balance us out, and I know that is no coincidence.  I believe my home would be so different even if one of them were gone. I know each person was handed these roles for specific reasons. The roles and personalities each and every one of us attains is what make my home the way it is.