Divorce and Re-marriage

Sadly, divorce is so easy now days. There is No Fault Divorce, where in the past, there had to be a real legit reason for people to divorce.
Marriage is a covenant. When I think of that I think of 100%-100%. Each person is giving 100%, and working at it.
The google definition says; agreement, commitment, guarantee, warrant, promise, bond. 
It seems people go into marriage expecting something so much different. Maybe thinking it is going to be easy, they aren't going to fight, and that there aren't going to be hard times. So many people have just said; "It's just not fun like we thought it would be." That's ridiculous! Marriage is two people working together. There are hard times. No matter what, there are going to be hard times, and yes, those difficult times could last for years. 70%  of people who get divorces say; "Not only COULD HAVE we saved the marriage, but we SHOULD HAVE saves it." Also, 70% of people who were having a very unsatisfying marriage has come back and said five years later that their marriages were either satisfying or very satisfying. It is something that takes work, but it gets better!

Then there are those people who are divorced, have kids, are starting to date and get remarried.
If you are marrying somebody who has kids, here are a few steps to remember.

1) It takes a minimum of two years to reach a normalcy in blended families.
2) The birth parents should be the ones to do all the heavy discipline. 
3) The step- parents should act more like a fantastic aunt or uncle. 
        -Clear expectations, and supports parents. 
4) Parents need to discuss things together privately.  More than other parents would normally do. 

Active Parenting

There's a few things parenting can do for someone:

• Helps people grow, learn, develop, and overcome
• Develop new qualities
• It is very fulfilling
• Teaches how to forgive others and themselves 
• Creates a stable environment
• Teaches adaptability 

Although, these benefits for the parents are just as beneficial for the children. 

When it comes to parenting, there are three different types. They are Authoritarian, Authoritative, and permissive. Authoritarian, or negative parenting, is the parents who are really hard on their children. They are very controlling, degrading, and harsh towards their children. Authoritative, or active parenting, is where parenting should be done. There's enough respect, and it allows the kid to know that the parent is in charge, but the parent is also a friend. It is a good between. Permissive, or push- over parenting is where the parent tries to hard to be the friend. They do not show any dominance, and there really is no control in the home. The children do not have respect, and kind of walk all over them. 

It takes a lot of trust on the child's part to let people parent them. it really does, so it's important to build that trust. And remember, Respect is not the same as fear.

Encourage your children!! Build on strengths, show confidence, value them, and stimulate independence. Don’t Focus on weaknesses, expect the worse or too little, expect too much, over overprotect or pamper. Also, children should be taught with warmth and constancy mostly rather than strictness. Also, when teaching children, focusing on the needs of the child rather than their behaviors is super beneficial.